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Why is it so hard to forgive and let go?

by Darreck on October 4, 2012

A few years back, I had difficulty learning to forgive people who had cheated me or had taken advantage of me. It was especially difficult to forgive when they were people I had trusted such as close friends, lover or family members. I believe there are many of you who shared, or, is having this experience now too.

The feeling that I felt were of betrayal and hurt in the heart. There were also the unlimited number of thought forms that kept playing in my mind . I was constantly thinking back about how situations had happened. The more I thought about the situations of being cheated, the worst I felt in my heart . Consequently, I created heavy loads of negativity in the body which affected my career and relationship with others.

One may share with your friends about the how terrible it felt of being hurt. Friends with good intention will then likely to advice that the best way forward is to forgive and let go. One might even read inspiring and well-meaning words and message from books, quotes, posts on Facebook and many other sources telling you the same too. At a moment of realization, you would finally agree that the self destructive behavior of thinking and feeling terrible will have to stop. You realized that you can only feel and become worst if it is allowed to continue.

At this moment of awareness, most of us will experience a phenomenon by way of a voice in our mind arguing against the realization, much like having a devil and an angel within our heads. There would be questions flooding into the mind, “Why should I forgive him/her as it was not my fault?” “ This person has ruined my life and does not deserved to be forgiven.”

This might go on and on, until another inner voice begins takes over, “Let’s forget about this person and start anew. Afterall, why should I allow this person to make me feel miserable?”

The situation might yo-yo back and forth, until you make a decision to change and forget, and life then goes on. You begin to feel better, and soon even learned to forget about the whole thing.

However, sometime later and out of the blue, the feeling of hurt surfaced again, giving you much pain in the heart. Again, the images of how the person you trusted had caused you harm keeps flashing in the mind.

This will immediately take you on a roller-coaster ride again. You will find that your energy level begin to swing up and down. As a result, you might become more moody and finally even falling into depression.

So, the question now is, “Do we really forgive and let go of the hurtful experiences?”

Months after months, years after years, your conscious and unconscious mind will warn you of the fear of being harmed and hurt again. This warning is likely to have been stored in you and will remain deep inside you. When you become aware of it, you ask, “Why does it not go away?” You may try to ignore it, not talk about it and hope that it will fade away in your memory.

In my opinion, I personally believe and know that the hoping of things to go away will not work. It does not go away! Instead, it will remain in our body, mind, heart and soul. We will carry these unseen forces or burden for the rest of our lives. These unseen forces and energies will then directly or indirectly begin to cause challenges in our new relationships.

Often, when trouble begins again within the new relationships, we will choose to make up excuses after excuses for why it had happened. These actions will just simply add on to the layers of negativity on top of original pain. We are, again, bringing the old garbage into a new relationship. Simply like the Japanese horror movie, The Ring. The cycle never ends.

(Believe it or not each of us are playing the similiar The Ring-Like story within us)

I strongly believe in the importance to knowing and understanding the energy patterns , the underlying lessons , and then we can clear those blocking lower energies and begin to cultivate love consciousness within us to enable us to break the cycle .

Otherwise, we are merely just hopeful that we will forget and unknowingly bury the unsettled and unresolved energy/lessons deeper within our body, mind, heart and soul.

This is not matter to be taken lightly and certainly not funny, especially when you find that you can’t seemed to establish and build loving and harmonious relationships with your lover, friends and family. This is because, the energies that were carried forward from your past experiences have not been settled yet, and will continue to block you in your ways.

At this point, you will know and acknowledge that it is critical to invest in yourself and keep yourself cleared of past energies. In fact, this gift to yourself is priceless, as it will finally allow you to let go of the blocks from your past and begin to create a wonderful, loving and harmonious journey in life with your loved ones.

If you have love relationship challenges in the present or past and yet to settled, and wish to understand the underlying energies and lessons. You may check it out with this link of how i may assist you.

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